The Sorrowful Mysteries and the DUI.

On Saturday there was a car accident a couple miles from my house that resulted in the loss of two lives.  It was an intersection that I have gone through many times myself.  Then, yesterday (Monday) I found out that one of the victims was none other than my next door neighbor.  She was only 23...  The other victim, Oscar, was a husband and a father of 3...  These realizations have brought the incident much closer to home, literally, right next door.  We immediately feel empathy for their families.  We can imagine what it would be like to lose a loved one, a coworker, a husband, a father, or even worse, a child.  The victims were each of these to someone.  

However, often overlooked, is empathy for the drunk driver whose mistake took their lives.  This morning during my Rosary I was shown how what the DUI driver is currently going through can be compared to the sorrowful mysteries of Christ.  The driver who caused the accident's name is Hector, but the same can be said for any driver who causes such an incident.

• The Agony in the Garden.  I don't know what the faith background of Hector is, but I can assure you of one thing.  He prayed that night.  Jesus knelt in the garden asking his father if "this cup could be taken from him."  Hector prayed the same thing.  Whether out of genuine concern for those injured, or out of fear of the consequences.  It does not matter.  Such an incident can bring anyone to their knees to say "Lord I ask that you take this cup from me."  The part we have trouble with is what Jesus said next, "not according to my will but Yours."  We know that Hector understands the first part of Jesus' prayer very well.  We pray that he (and all of us) come to understand the second.
• The Scourging at the Pillar.  Have you ever seen how cops treat criminals?  While I can't vouch for all of them, I can only imagine the humiliation Hector must have experienced in those first few hours.  If he was legally drunk, then he is legally responsible for killing two people.  I don't mean to say that cops are barbarians out to insult criminals, but if you are in custody, then things have likely gone horribly wrong for you at that moment.  Cops are the first responders, and frequently, the only teachers who tell those in custody what they did and why it is wrong.  Those who were in charge of processing him likely did not have any compassion for the remorse he may have been feeling.  DUI's can be tricky things.  Have you ever asked yourself where the .08 came from?  Not everyone processes alcohol the same way.  Some people can be "fall over drunk" at .04, and others can be perfectly normal at .18.  We understand why there needs to be a legal benchmark, but Hector may not have "felt drunk" at the time he got behind the wheel.  We always imagine the driver of the vehicle to be the image of the person who drank a whole fifth in an hour and couldn't walk or talk.  It isn't the case.  Hector could have been .081 after 3 drinks (don't kid yourself, 3 can do it) and just tried to get himself and his friends from A to B.
• The Crowing with Thorns. In this day of technology, word of someone's sins travels fast.  The next day, pictures of the victims and of Hector were released via Facebook.  The title of the article was "alleged DUI."  We have forgotten a couple things.  First, that the word "alleged" means something.  In my statistics class yesterday we went over how a 99.8% accurate test for a disease can be administered and come back positive, yet after that, there was only 1.3% chance of having it once you have tested positive.  Sound strange?  Do the math, or you can just trust me, I am a math teacher.  Do I believe that he was drunk? Sure, but let's not crucify him just yet.  Second, when his mug shot was released there were immediate comments that he was some sort of monster, who deserved to die in the place of the two victims.  We watch too many movies.  Do you really think that he is some sort of sociopath who feels no remorse for having killed two people?  No.  Do you really think that he said before he left his house that evening, "maybe I'll get tanked and run a red light and kill two people."  No.  He didn't say that.  This is not an episode of Law and Order.  He left his house wanting to have fun on a Saturday night, just like many people, including my wife, who was only one block away and could have easily chosen to go through that fateful intersection on the way home.  We need to pray for him, not judge his current state of remorse.  Jesus was mockingly labeled the "king of the Jews," and Hector is mockingly labeled as someone who deserves to die because he made a bad choice.
• Jesus Carries his Cross. We all bear crosses each and every day.  We deal not only with our own suffering and the stress of life, but also with the weight of our own sin.  Have you ever heard a speaker talk about what it is like to be the drunk driver?  Hector will carry this cross forever.  It will leave a mark on him.  With time he can seek forgiveness from the parents and siblings of Molly and the family of Oscar.  And, most importantly, with reconciliation, he can seek forgiveness from our Father in heaven.  But, he will never forget, and neither will we.  We can take that suffering and unite it to Jesus on the cross.  Out of that will pour love, the same love that will help us forgive Hector and the same love that will let Hector forgive himself.
• Jesus dies on the Cross.  Death is coming for all of us, there is nothing more sure than that.  Jesus' death was special, in that it bore the sins of each of us.  God uses all of the suffering in this world to bring about conversion, to bring about the greater good.  Let us hope that he uses the death of Molly and Oscar to bring about conversion in all of us.  Let us use this to remember that God's mercy is greater than our sin.  We pray that none lose faith in God because they have to suffer, but to recognize that their suffering more closely unites them to Christ, whether that suffering comes by way of the lost loved one, or the realization that you are the one that took their life.

Lectio Divina: The first attempt.

God was funny today.  He likes having “told you so” jokes at my expense.

I am listening to a Spiritual Theology class by Dr. Brant Pitre.  He finally has me convinced that I need to study scripture every morning.  So, finally, I actually do it.  My wife and I set our alarms for 30 min earlier than usual.  We got up and read today’s gospel (not together).  It wasn’t very long, so I just read the whole chapter (Mark 4).  For the past week, I have been hearing Dr. Pitre liken meditating on scripture to that of the parable of the sower.  If you don’t meditate on scripture, your soul will be like the path, the rocky soil, or the thorns.  Do you know what Mark chapter 4 is?  Yep… The sower.  I actually laughed out loud when I opened the bible.

The joke didn’t end there.  Yesterday I was telling my wife about how the Church uses the hemorrhaging woman to “define” the Sacraments:  Power that flows forth from the body of Christ.  I said yesterday, “I don’t remember where that is in the bible, I will have to go find it.”  One of the footnotes from Mark 4 talked about how Jesus followed the mustard seed parable with 4 miracles.  So, I flipped the page to see what they were.  Sure enough, there was the hemorrhaging woman.  I lol’ed again.  Needles to say, I think he hooked me into this morning lectio divina thing. I probably read too much for a lectio divina, but I’m still figuring out exactly how these 4 steps work (read, meditate, pray, contemplate).  It was good either way.

Through the eyes of Mary

What a morning indeed.

I've been praying the Rosary every morning lately. Well, not every morning, every morning commute in the car (5 out of 7 is about a C, you have to start somewhere). God has been lovingly granting me little insights each day. It always happens on the fifth mystery, no more, no less.  It happened for many days in a row.  I wondered if it was ok to ask for them. So, one day I did.  As anyone could have guessed, that was when I didn't get one.  In a way, God showed me by his perceived absence that I should not be saying the Rosary for me, I should be saying the Rosary to worship God. If he decides to speak back that's great, but what I need is to long for him.  You learn longing by absence, not presence.  In the same day that I didn't get an insight, I listened to a talk that explained exactly why.  And, Dr. Pitre also gave something to try in my next Rosary. Yesterday, I gave it a go. I tried to picture the joyful mysteries through the eyes of Mary.  It was very cool to try and put yourself in Mary shoes through the joyful mysteries.  Then, Tuesday came… The sorrowful mysteries...

In the first mystery I tried to imagine watching my own son's agony in the garden.  To have a child who is sick, and you be completely helpless, is one of the worst feelings you can experience as a parent.  My heart sank.  When I came to the second mystery, the scourging, I didn't just imagine my own son being flogged. Putting myself in Mary's shoes was in adequate. I put myself in my wife's shoes with Mary. The way a mother and a father love their child is different.  For my wife, their pain is her pain, their tears are her tears, their cries of agony are her cries of agony.  They are almost united, it is so beautiful.  The next two mystries came and went just the same. Jesus' agony was Mary's agony.  I saw it through my wife’s and Mary’s eyes and I could feel it through my wife's and Mary’s pain. Then, the fifth decade came. 

I imagined watching my son being murdered on the cross for my sins.  That definitely was heavy.  Just when I thought that was bad enough, it came. That is not what Mary felt at all. She didn't watch her son be murdered for her sins, she didn't have any sins. She watched her son be murdered on the cross for the sins of others, for my sins.  She watched as her innocent son endured a horrific death out of sacrifice.  She watched as the nails were driven into his hands instead of mine.  She watched as his love for me poured out of his side...

That was the end of my dry face.  I now understand the title “Our Lady of Sorrows.” She loves her son so much, and her Son love me so much.  To Mary, “Behold, your son.”  And to John, and all of us, “Behold, your mother.”

Sanctity of Life Month

Being sanctity of life month, I felt compelled to share something that came to me in prayer this morning.

Earlier this week I had to give a presentation on the Trinity.  No problem, right?  Wrong.  Like everyone else, I find this challenging. I recite the whole “person vs nature” thing, but I didn’t have any substance beyond that, so I had to do some research. I think it can be briefly summarized as follows: person answers the question “who?", and the nature answer the question “what?” Some What’s also have a Who and some do not.

What is a rock? A rock.  Who is a rock? They don’t have a who.Who is that? Bob.  What is Bob? A human.  Who is urging me to pray? The Holy Spirit.  What is the Holy Spirit? God.  And so on…    

That was completely insufficient to explain the Trinity, but that isn't where I wanted to go with this either.  Instead, I want to talk about abortion.  In this discussion on abortion, we spend a lot of time trying to answer the question of “Who is it?"  The Dr. Seuss quote comes to mind: "A person is a person no matter how small.”  But, we don't have human dignity and human rights because we are a person, we have human dignity because we are human!  It is the “what” that matters, not the “who”.  So instead, we should focus on "what is the fetus/embryo/zygote?” It is human.  When does it become human?  At conception.  If we then ask the question: How many cells do you need to be human? No matter what somebody answers, you would've been half as many some time before and did the “what” change in that time? No. You can repeat this all the way until you are one cell.  All that changes after that is the age of the human.  The life begins at conception, because you are human at conception.  We believe in true human rights, because that is "what" we are… Human.

I had heard this general argument before from Trent Horn, but I had never connected it with the definitions that outline the Trinity.

Judging

There are three or four things that commonly get lumped together in the same concept. The first is the "our judgment," the judgment by Jesus, our particular judgment and our final judgment. The other two, are "using judgment," and finally "judging others." They're all quite distinct and yet somehow we hear "don't judge me," so often. I am sure that volumes and volumes could be written on this topic. I will not do it justice here, but I will try and sort it out a little bit. 

1) Our judgment: Particular and final. The particular judgment is the judgment that we face the moment we die. The time when Jesus judges us according to our works as Paul says in Romans 2:6-7 and Galations 5:19-21 (among others). Those who have done good go to heaven, and those who have done bad do not. At this point we either go to heaven, hell, or purgatory on the way to heaven.  The final judgment comes at the end of time, when all is finished. The final judgment isn't really an encore of judging, but rather, when we get to see the final outcome of all of our actions over the course of time. Our actions produce such complicated results that nobody knows this except God. The final judgment is where we get to see the ramifications of our decisions throughout history. 

I think it's a bit interesting that people often say "Jesus is my judge, not you". Of course Jesus is our only judge. No one on earth has the power to send anyone to heaven or to hell. When we say "don't judge me," it has a completely different meaning.  In addition, because Jesus judges us according to our works and what we know, whether someone goes to heaven or not might be more complicated than we realize. When he said "don't judge others," I think it was a warning not to compare ourselves to others. We do not know what is in their hearts, and what it took for them to do a certain action. It may be a far greater step toward God for someone, who was raised believing that torture is a good thing, to simply "not torture someone" than it is for someone who was raised with the truth to perform some good work. We shouldn't look around at the evil in the world and think "we are good, we will make it into heaven because we are better than them." This is the wrong attitude. God wants us to give all of ourselves to him. Let us not forget the line in the Our Father prayer, "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." We will be shown forgiveness as we forgive, and we will be judged according to what we know. 

2) Using judgment. As Jesus said that we are supposed to pick up our cross and follow him Daily.  We must use judgment on what actions to take and which ones not to. We can do this from a completely objective point of view by using the church and the Bible to tell us what actions are right and what actions are wrong. However, we don't live in a bubble. We live in a complicated world. We must use judgment to look around and see what actions are right and what actions are wrong. If we see someone doing wrong, we must think to ourselves, don't do that. This is not judging them for what they are doing, this is merely using judgment for what we should not do. We often hear the phrase "love the sinner hate the sin." We don't have to condemn people for their actions but we do need to condemn their actions. The phrase "love the sinner hate the sin" is a strange one, but it is correct.  I think CS Lewis said it very well, (paraphrased) "There is one person that we know that we love no matter what sin they commit, ourselves. We love ourselves, but hate our sin. And Jesus said to love others as you love yourselves that means love the sinner but hate the sin."  Let us not forget the golden rule, "Treat others as you want to be treated."  I think loving the sinner and hating the sin is the most reasonable place to begin.

3) Judging others. Let's take a look at Proverbs 27:5, "better is open rebuke than hidden love."  When we hear that open rebuke is good, it means that we should like it when others rebuke our sin. If we are doing something wrong, we should like it when we are called out on it.  Of course, we don't.  It is embarrassing to get called out and our first reaction is to defend our actions.  But, if our goal is to follow Jesus and to follow his commandments, then we should like to be let known when we are not doing so. We want to conform ourselves to Christ, and if that takes someone else letting us know the way in which we are not conformed then we should enjoy that rebuke,  not put them down with some empty phrase "how dare you judge me!"  If we are being judged by men, then we should pay attention to what we are being judged for. Jesus will be our judge someday. We might as well get a little bit of practice here on earth. 

Is it actually okay to judge someone? I think the answer here is somewhat complicated but in the end, yes, I think it is okay to judge someone's behavior. The means are important, however.  We must do everything out of love for our neighbor.  If we mention it to them, we must have their best interest in mind and not 'lord it over' them. Moreover, we must not do it being a hypocrite.  Let us not forget the phrase, "when you point a finger at someone, three point back at you."  Think about that.  Although being a hypocrite is actually objectively irrelevant (we can know that something is wrong and do it anyway, i.e. sin), our message will be ignored.

In Matthew 7:3-5 we see the following:

"Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the plank that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye."

In the story of the plank, God says "how can you get this plank out of someone's eye when you have a plank in your own eye?" This is clearly condemning hypocrites, that is, don't tell someone that they are sinning if you are committing the same sin. The more interesting part is that I think many of us do not realize how that story ends. Jesus says first take the plank out of your own eye, and then help them get the speck out of there.   He doesn't say ignore their speck, he doesn't say ignore your plank, he says get the plank out of your eye, and then help them with their speck. He wants us to help others remove the specks from their eyes, but we can only do this effectively if the plank is not in our own.  Not only are we hypocrite, but we do not have credibility. The world has trouble seeing things objectively, and they need to rely a lot on the credibility of the source. It is, after all, through credibility that we have the church and the Bible and well, everything we know about anything. We must maintain our credibility if we are going to help our brother and her sister.  We are our brothers keeper. 

In summary. Do not judge others to heaven or to hell, and do not expect to find anyone in either place when you die.  I imagine that there will be surprises.  Worry about yourself and how you will be judged with regard to this. Do not perform the great comparison of who should be in heaven, and who should be in hell. Only the church was given permission to bind and lose, not us. We are free to look around the world and use judgment on how we should behave. We are free to see actions and choose not to do them ourselves. We are free to judge others actions without judging them.  If we are going to let someone know that what they are doing is wrong, we must not be a hypocrite and do it with charity. Everything must be done in love, for love, and with love.

Evil and Suffering

I have been listening to Catholic Answers for over a year now.  Every once in a while they have shows for non-Christians to call in and talk about why they don't believe in God.  Inevitably, the number one problem has a theme, though it can be stated in many ways, it is called "The Problem of Evil."  I have two points I want to make about this:

1) The problem of evil.

What is the problem of evil?  It can be formed in many ways, including, but not limited to:

1. Why do bad things happen to good people?
2.  Why do the innocent (especially Children) suffer?
3. How can a good God allow evil in the world?
4. How can he have created us so that some of can go bad, very very bad?

I recently read a book called Mere Christianity by CS Lewis.  It has quickly become one of my favorite books, I am already "reading" it again (quotes because I have the audiobook).  CS Lewis gave the following analogy when prompted about how "bad" can exist: darkness is not a thing in itself, but rather a lack of light.  In a similar way "bad" is not a thing in itself, but rather a lack of "good".  God gave us free will, and his love and respect for us is so great that he is even respect our decision not to love Him.  Then it becomes clear how evil can be in the world.  It is from those of us who choose not to love and obey God.  Bad happens because of people lacking good.  It is because of sin.  Original sin caused us to have a broken nature.  Our broken nature gives us a desire to sin, a desire to fill the emptiness in our lives with things of this world, and often times, things that offend God.  Sin.

The problem of evil doesn't end there.  God is all good, and as such only wills things that will be for our ultimate good.  When a person asks "why do the innocent suffer?" they are thinking only of this world.  While some might think it is obvious that suffering is bad (or a lack of good), there is a huge burden of proof in this claim.  You would have to show that the suffering in question does not do any good in the person's life. Which brings me to the second point:

2) It is amazing how God brings people home through suffering.

In light of the problem of evil people, I must ask, have you ever listened to conversion stories?  Go find a group of converts to the faith and you too will find a common theme.  There are a lot of bad things that happened to people that brought them to where they are now on their faith journey.  These include, but are not limited to circumstances such as: deaths in the family, divorce, childhood abandonment, cancer, cancer treatments, car accidents, abortion, adultery, you name it.  There are always a number of horrific circumstances that will make a person reevaluate their life.  As a disclaimer, it isn't always bad.  I, myself, am a convert who simply went looking for the truth, and managed to find it in an unsuspecting place.  That aside, you will generally find that in a room full of converts, it is almost a given that something bad had happened that brought them to realize the place they should be.  And looking back at part 1, we can see that it is, in fact, out of suffering that God can bring the biggest graces into our lives.  We are so strong-willed and pig-headed that God has to use suffering as a means to get our heads out of the clouds and focus in the direction that we want to go, home to heaven.

While I don't have any horrific suffering in my past, I can't deny that God, frequently, has to go to some extraordinarily great lengths to get through my selfish pride and get me to listen.   Getting me to realize that I was proud was step one, and I am still working toward step 2... I'll let you know what it is when I get there...   CS Lewis called pride the "Sin of all Sins" and it is easy to see why.  It is the kind of sin that gets you to think you know best.  It was pride that got Adam and Eve to eat the fruit from the tree; they wanted to be "like gods" in knowing good and evil.  And so it was, pride set this problem of evil in motion.  It is the root of our broken nature, the root of our sin.  We have evil in the world because it is exactly what you would expect when the people that populate it have original sin, pride, and free will.  

A Bible Study

I have come across a fantastic scripture study that both Protestants and Catholics can do.  It focuses on the life of Jesus and the miracles that surrounded his birth, his life, and and his death.  What you do is you read the following verses and meditate on them:

1. Start with the prayer Jesus taught us in the sermon on the mount, the Our Father.  Mostly to remind us that He is God, and we are not, but also to put our petitions in perspective.  Luke 11:2-4
2. The Angel Gabriel announces his birth to Mary. Luke 1:26-38 (Pay close attention to Luke 1:28)
3. Mary visits Elizabeth. Luke 1:39-56 (Pay close attention to Luke 1:42)
4. The birth of Jesus. Luke 2:6-20
5. Jesus is presented in the temple. Luke 2:22-39
6. They found Jesus in the temple. Luke 2:41-51
7. Jesus was baptized by John the baptist. Luke 3:15-22, John 1:26-34
8. Jesus at the wedding feast of Cana.  John 2:1-12
9. Jesus proclaimed the Kingdom. Mark 1:14-15
10. Jesus is transfigured.  Matthew 17:1-8
11. The last supper. Luke 22: 14-20
12. Jesus is sold out my Judas in the garden. Luke 22:39-46
13. Jesus is scourged at the pillar. Luke 23:16-22
14. Jesus is crowned with thorns. Mathew 27:29-30
15. Jesus carries his cross.  Luke 23:26-33
16. Jesus is crucified. Luke 23:33-46
17. Jesus is resurrected. Matthew 28:1-10
18. Jesus ascends into Heaven. Luke 24: 50-51
19. The holy spirit descends. Acts 2:1-41
20. Give all of the glory to God in his 3 persons:  Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.  As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be.  Amen.

This is a really cool bible study that I think one could do part of each and every day.  Being Protestant or Catholic is irrelevant, we are simply meditating on the life and death of Jesus, and He is our aim.  We can learn a lot about him and ourselves by meditating on these scripture verses.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention.  Once you have meditated on these verses, you will have said almost 4 complete Rosaries. Yep, you heard it right here.  The Rosary is nothing more than scripture meditation.  Even the Hail Mary (see #2 and #3).  So, meditate, pray, and praise Jesus for giving us his Mother on the cross (John 19:27).

**Note: For those wondering, there are two more mysteries of the Rosary that I have omitted: The Assumption of Mary, and Her Coronation.  These are both alluded to in the book of Revelation, and thus are perfectly scriptural.  But, it was outside of the point I wanted to make here.  There are additionally a few more prayers in the Rosary, but again, the point here was the the overall big-picture of the Rosary is a meditation on the life and death of Jesus Christ.